White House Refuses To Build Death Star, Darth Vader Not Impressed

White House Refuses To Build Death Star, Darth Vader Not ImpressedThe White House has officially refused to build a Death Star and Darth Vader considers this a serious mistake.

In an official petition signed by more then 34,000 people, President Obama’s Administration was requested to begin building a Death Star to be operational by the year 2016.

According to policy, the White House must respond to any petitions with over 25,00 signatures and it did so in an educational and humorous way.

Citing three major reasons why the United States could not build a Death Star at this time, the White House made its case in earnest. Here are the officially cited reasons:

  • The construction of the Death Star has been estimatedĀ to cost more than $850,000,000,000,000,000. We’re working hard to reduce the deficit, not expand it.
  • The Administration does not support blowing up planets.
  • Why would we spend countless taxpayer dollars on a Death Star with a fundamental flaw that can be exploited by a one-man starship?

Of course, by refusing to build the planet busting space station, the White House drew the wrath of none other than Darth Vader (via Twitter). The Sith Lord was quoted as saying, or rather, tweeting “A serious mistake, Mr. President. You can never have enough planet-sized lasers.” Perhaps sensing a disturbance in the Force, the White House did not directly engage Darth Vader in a productive dialogue about the matter.

Not one to miss an educational opportunity, the White House petition did mention advances in space and technology that the United States is currently pursuing, including a football field-sized space station already orbiting the planet (the International Space Station) and robots with lasers exploring other planets (Mars expedition). The Administration also encouraged those who are looking to increase our country’s strengths in space to pursue educations in math, science, engineeringĀ and technology.

You can read the entire government response to the petition here: https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/response/isnt-petition-response-youre-looking

To maintain a peaceful coexistence in our solar system, the White House denied the petition to build a Death Star. Let’s hope Darth Vader doesn’t find a sufficient following among Twitter to pursue the same thing.

What do you think about the petition and the response? Let me know in the comments below!

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About Lauren Patzer

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Article writer, screenplay writer, fiction author living in Katy, TX
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